Dr. Dawg

Henhouse: impartial inquiry slated

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(Nunavut, June 2) DawgNews has learned that a deadly raid on a local henhouse will be investigated by Br’er Reynard Fox, whose family is accused of eating nine of the birds and biting several others.

"We see no reason why Br’er Fox should not take the lead in this investigation," said Stephen Hopper, of the Arctic hare community. "He can be trusted to be objective, and besides, he has considerable expertise in the area of henhouse raids." Hopper has expressed "regret" over the deaths of the hens, while refusing to condemn the foxes who took part in the action.

Strong criticism of the attack has been all but universal, but a spokesperson for the golden eagles urged restraint. "We shouldn't rush to judgement here," said Killery Henton. "The fox community has been pecked by rogue hens for some time and has a right to defend itself." She expressed the hope that stalled peace talks between the two warring factions will soon be back on track.

The suggestion that an inquiry be carried out by a well-respected owl, Rawk Lodestone, has been rejected. "The last time Lodestone looked into something like this, he proved to be anti-foxic," said fox leader B’hen Netanother. "And the Animal Council can't be trusted to be impartial."

The investigation, to be joined by representatives of the tundra vole, marmot and lemming communities, is expected to begin shortly before suppertime.

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This page contains a single entry by Dr. Dawg published on June 2, 2010 10:11 AM.

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